Top Five Reasons Why I’m an Odd Duck

Reason #5: Well, first of all, I use the phrase “odd duck.” Duh. That one was a total gimme.

Reason #4: When I discover there is a dance tutorial at the end of the High School Musical DVD, I get a little excited. Like, Jump Up And Down In The Privacy Of My Living Room Squealing “Oooooh! Bring It ON! Let’s Bop To The TOP!” excited. And then I get way sweaty. From the bustin’ of the moves?

Reason #3: Three words: I [heart] Strong Bad. For reals. He’s the shizznit. I find him extraordinarily funny. Cracks me right up, he does. Especially Trogdor the Burninator. “TROOOGDOOOOR! Burninating the countryside! Burninating the peasants! Burninating all the people and the thatched-roof cottages! Thatched roof cottages!” Yeah. It’s a classic.

Reason #2: Not only can I tell you which episode of The Brady Bunch will be airing within the first five seconds of the show (Guaranteed. No, seriously. Try me.), I have the same ability with Gilligan’s Island. What can I say? It’s a gift. Don’t hate me for my bad-ass cognitive recall ability. It’s frighteningly selective.

Reason #1: When I discover there is a sliver of a chance that I could fly out to California for the Emmys and walk the Red Carpet with Ryan Seacrest– and possibly be in the same vicinity as Kristen Bell! And Lauren Graham! And Hugh Laurie! And lots and lots of other famous actors who were actually NOMINATED for Emmys!– and all I have to do is send in one teensy-tiny tape of myself interviewing someone, well, I get a little crazy. CLEARLY.

But as a rep from the network sponsoring the challenge CALLED ME TODAY (I guess my Ry-Ry was too busy or something, whatev) and engaged me in an impromptu telephone interview (SQUEEEEEEE! SQUEEEEEE!!!… *deep breath*), I suppose The Crazy inside ain’t all bad, then, eh? Who’s laughing now, TGIM?! Huh?! Booyah!

Oh, man. When the caller asked me why I wanted to win, I blurted out, “Because I want to meet Ryan Seacrest! And interview celebrities! Preferably Kristen Bell!” And when he asked me what my hobbies were, did I plug my site? Did I?! NO. I choked. “I like to jog… and write… oh, and I blog… and read and watch TV, of course!” Blogging came third?! And no mention of my site?! Good LORD, people! I didn’t mention my site! Honestly. This is why I am not in advertising, y’all. CHOKE.

Honestly, I don’t expect to win. I’m just flattered they thought my (very first!) video was good enough to warrant a call to me. Because hello? It’s ten shades of insane?

Seriously. Whatever. I don’t even care…

Aaaaaaaaaaeeeeeeeiiiiiiiii!…yiyiyiyiyI!…woo-HOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Okay. Maybe I care a little.

(*rushes off to find paper bag for the hyperventilation*)