Home Again. Jiggety Jig?

August 27, 2008

First, allow me to say that Twitter? Totally sucking my will to blog. Dude. I’m saying. Right? I shall categorize this under “BAD.”

That being said…

New York City? NYC? The Big Apple? New York, New York?

Awesome. Honestly. The Big Appliest! It’s Big Applicious! I wanna be a part of it… er, you know… New York, New York?

Shut up right now! YOU try to talk about NYC without even at least HUMMING the song. In your MIND. It just can’t be done!

Sadly, there was no Sarah Jessica Parker sighting, but no one ever said life was fair, or if they did, it’s like my daddy always said: “Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.” Wait. No, my bad, that was the Dread Pirate Roberts. But still! So very true.

I didn’t see a Broadway musical either. This also falls under the whole Life is So Terribly Unfair and Who Do They Think They Are Charging So Much Money For One Stinkin’ Ticket Anyway, Huh?! category.

I am composing this post using a Worpress app on my sweet li’l iPhone. I am saying this because it is slow GOING. Which means… bored now.

Must. Blog. Later.

Need. Chocolate. NOW.

And a nap would be nice. You know, if I didn’t need to get back to work and stuff.

MAN! Lunch breaks need siesta time built in! Hello?! That’s all I’m saying. Chocolate and Nap Time. I’ll totally bring that up at the next staff meeting.

And now I shall throw in a picture. Hopefully it will not be GINORMOUS. I will not be counting out the possibility, though. It may be huge.

Going on a Mini-Break!

August 21, 2008


Okay, so we’re breaking out! The stay-cation has morphed into a wicked cool mini-break! Woot! YES! Because stay-cations equal sadness for all. Honestly. Well, at least for DWM and clan. I’m just saying. Staying is NO FUN. At ALL.

So, now that I’m done with the filming (oooh, that’s what we call a “teaser” in the biz…) We’re off to NYC, all y’all. That’s right! New York City! All of us! Even TGIM! We’ve never been, so… EXCITING?! That being said, if there is anything we absoLUTEly need to do while we’re in the Big Apple (wait… do we still call it that? is that un-hip of me? Dear LORD! I don’t even KNOW!), let me know, mm’kay?

And now, I must pack. For the wicked cool mini-break I happen to be going on with the fam. Because we are done with the shoot. And we are no longer staying. We are mini-breaking. Which is way better.


Ode to P, My BFF: Happy Birthday!

August 15, 2008

Pro Shop

When your TGIM and your kiddos are all the way across the country and everyone else– except for ONE of your FIVE siblings– yes! even including your MOTHER!– forgets that it is your very happy birthday, and you wake up lonely and depressed because, hello?! birthday breakfast in bed?! presents?! tradition?! does no one care about TRADITION?!, do you know what the one thing that could make it better would be? DO YOU?!

Well, yeah, a guest starring role as a Horrible Evil Sidekick in Joss Whedon’s next internet musical venture, sure, but I meant the OTHER thing. The thing where you hear pounding on your front door, so you run downstairs in your comfy pajamas and crazy bed hair because you were feeling too sorry for yourself to make any kind of effort, you know?, and who is standing there but your BFF holding a ginormous paper bag from McDonald’s.

And you smell bacon.

“I didn’t know what you usually get for your birthday breakfast in bed, so I got a little of everything,” Paige said as she pushed past me into the house. “Now go get back in bed!”

And dammit if I didn’t scamper upstairs and plop into bed! After I snapped out of the bacon-smell-induced euphoria that held me quick, that is.

Paige followed and we spent the next hour eating all sorts of (nasty yet somehow delicious) McDonald’s breakfast food while I introduced her to the joys (and sorrows) of Dr. Horrible.

I know, right?

Who could ask for a better BFF? Not I.

So, happy birthday right back at’cha, Paige. I would have returned the favor, but you’re off on adventures, so this meager happy birthday wish will have to do.

I hope your day is SCRUMPTRILESCENT. You know what I mean.

Love ya, P.

In the 80’s, everything was copasetic.

August 12, 2008

(I originally posted this back in August of ’05, but now with my 20-year reunion a’loomin’ and me feeling wicked nostalgic and whatnot, I thought I’d do a little DWM REWIND and post it again, slightly altered for timeliness. Because it’s my blog and I CAN, that’s why!)

Feeling nostalgic. That is all. Feel free to add to the list. In fact, I strongly encourage you to do so!

Things I Miss from the 80’s:

1. Seeing 95 pounds peeking out at me from my scale. *le sigh*

2. Cruising for boys on Gurley Street with my homies, blasting the remix version of Billy Idol’s “Catch My Fall” (killer bassline, y’all), sipping Sundance Sparklers (nonalcoholic!), screaming “Memory! All alone in the MOOOOONLIGHT!” every time we passed by the scene of a make-out or break-up. Of which there were several. Ooooh! And “Old Man Driiiiiiver!” (to the tune of “Old Man River”) whenever we passed by guys WAY TOO OLD to be out cruising. Of which there were several. Huh, Di?! Huh?!

3. My ginormous Esprit and Guess? bags, which held everything from my Adventures in Literature textbook to my clunky cheer shoes to five or six really radical to the max cassette tapes to my assorted jelly bracelets and banana clips. And sometimes my lunch.

4. Rainbow-colored eyeshadow and blue mascara. And blue eyeliner, of COURSE. Duh.

5. Wham! The Wham Rap? Classic, y’all. CLASSIC. I still know all the words. Ask anyone. Go on. Try me. Do it. No, really. DO IT.

6. The Solid Gold Dancers. No, seriously. LOVED. THEM. Wanted to BE. THEM.

7. Saying “psyche!” Oh, and “freak!” Wait…

8. Star Search. When it was GOOD.

9. The Brat Pack.

10. Crimped hair, big bangs, strategically placed headbands, bangle earrings, and Swatch Watches with jelly Swatch Guards.

11. Cyberpunk Max Headroom. CATCH THE WAVE!! ‘Member, guys?! Do ya?! Dude. That was totally our Homecoming slogan one year. Go, Badgers!

12. Atari. I mean, c’mon… Frogger? Pitfall? GALAGA?! Hello?!

13. Spandex biker shorts under my paint-splashed, acid-washed denim mini. It just LOOKED COOL, okay?! Geez.

14. Debbie Gibson…. What?! I DO! And if you must know, it is possible that I miss Tiffany, as well. PERHAPS.

15. A time when I actually WANTED my MTV.

16. Echo & the Bunnymen, Cutting Crew, Scritti Politti, Tears for Fears, and Orchestral Maneuvers in the Dark.

17. My acid-washed jean jacket covered with ENORMOUS, entirely superfluous silver buttons and an assortment of safety pins with multicolored beads strung through them. Which meant I was very popular and had lots of friends. Right?

18. Sleep overs with my girlfriends, at which we listened to KISS FM, gossiped about boys, experimented with our hair, traded comfy pink Esprit sweatshirts for zip-tapered, pastel-flowered Guess? jeans, and– contrary to TGIM‘s much-fantasized belief– DID NOT engage in naked pillow-fighting. But TGIM? Said girlfriends DID teach me how to French kiss. That one’s all yours, baby.

19. Slap bracelets. Preferably neon. Lots of ’em.

20. Freezing my ass off while cheering at home football games. In the snow. In a cheerleading uniform. With NO pantyhose or tights. Because that would have been TACKY.

21. Singing along to “Wig” by the B-52’s at the top of my lungs on the bus during away football trips: “What’s that on your head? A wig! Wig, wig, wig! Wig’s on fire! Wig’s on fire! Wig’s on… fire! It’s 2525 and we’ve got the most wigs alive!” Why does nobody REMEMBER this song?

22. Tanning on the roof with a fluffy towel, my boombox, and big-A bottle of Hawaiian Tropic Dark Tanning Oil. For the Tan of the Islands! Or more freckles! Usually more freckles! Whatever!

23. Every single solitary stinkin’ John Hughes movie. I mean, sometimes I used to watch The Dead Zone on USA just to see Farmer Ted (AKA: The Geek from Sixteen Candles) and reminisce. “I never bagged a babe. I’m not a stud.” Seriously. Who writes movies like that anymore?! No one, that’s who!

24. Jams with coordinating t-back tank tops.

25. Comfy, unlaced Keds.

26. First REAL kisses. Cheetos optional.

27. Boys in cuffed jeans and unlaced Reebok high tops. I don’t know why, really.

28. Slouch socks. Ooooh! And slouch boots! Because they totally hid my freakish chicken ankles, all right?

29. My mini black lace ra-ra skirt, a la Madonna in Desperately Seeking Susan. HAWT.

30. Wearing sunglasses at night. Hey. Don’t be afraid of the guy in shades, oh no.

Sadly, I could go on and on and on…

Not that NOW isn’t good! Oh, I LOVE now! But your high school years, they stay with you, you know?

Which, once you think about it, is at the same time slightly comforting and absolutely horrifying. Especially, it seems, if you lived out your teenage years in the 80’s. Just sayin’. That’s a hard era to shake. The hair, the styles… I mean, just look at all the Mom-Pants out there. Totally 80’s! Honestly. It’s 2008! Lose the MOM-PANTS, ladies! LOSE THEM NOW.

And sometimes, guys? Sometimes? I have this almost overwhelming desire to poof up my bangs. You know, just a little. Like, “Oh, just an inch or so won’t hurt….” But it would! Dear lord, it WOULD!

Oh, NO. I just realize that the bulk of my childhood was spent during the 70’s! Don’t even get me STARTED on homemade polyester bell-bottoms, roller skating rinks, my Donna Summers fixation, tetherball wars, and hula hoops. PLEASE. Just… don’t.

That’s a post for another day, y’all. A post for another day…

Random Thoughts on a Friday Midmorning

August 8, 2008

The kiddos come home next Friday, so YAY! You know, I always miss them SOOO much more than I think I will. Honestly. What does that say about me– as a momma– that I think I won’t miss them?

Great. Now I have thoughts.

Speaking of Dr. Horrible, if you haven’t seen Felicia “Penny” Day’s webisode series “The Guild” yet, you should totally check it out! (What? I wasn’t speaking of Dr. Horrible? Well, there’s a mad crazy switch.) It won the 2007 YouTube Video Award and e’rything! I’m spreading the love because I think it is hilarious so I want to share AND because I absolutely ADORE being the one that points out fun, pop-culturally-relevant stuff to people. It makes me feel happy and important. Sometimes, even, I get tingles. Tingles in happy and important places. So, you’re welcome.

Also, I am very weird.

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