Confessions of a Crafty Chassy

November 16, 2011

Hi. My name is Cat and I am a crafting addict. A crafting addict with total ADHD. And impulse control issues when confronted with awesome fabrics that are totally on sale.

Hi, Cat!

Yes. I admit it has been a severe blow to my self-esteem to realize that I need HELP, y’all. I thought I had all of my projects under control. One can never juggle too many projects at once! Seriously! There’s absolutely nothing wrong with keeping busy, is all I’m saying! It’s GOOD to be productive! Right? Am I right?! RIGHT?!

Right?

In my defense, I don’t have a craft room or any place awesome like that where I can escape and just sew and knit and paint and Mod Podge like nobody’s business. Nope. So when I drag my old sewing machine out of its hiding spot in the cupboard, dust it off, and lug it to the craft table I only just broke out of storage, well, I’m going to get some things DONE, by golly! CRAFTY things! Because remembering how to thread the machine correctly so the thread doesn’t jam the needle up, and how to properly fill bobbins and whatnot is no picnic when you have accidentally totally misplaced your sewing machine manual and your machine is, like, fifteen years old and you can’t find the manual online– except for the one that might be the right one but they want you to PAY for it, which what the WHAT (?!) and no THANK you, because it’s the whole principle of the thing.

Just saying.

Honestly. I thought I could handle the knitted Christmas stockings, the Dot quilt, the Window Box quilt, the quilted Christmas stockings, the button monogram on canvas, the knitted Sweetheart socks, the Mod-Podged wooden “L”… AND the felt Advent Calendar!

*sigh*

I need help.

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With Friends Like These

November 7, 2011

Conversation between TGIM and Mack in the DWM family car, after Mack explains that oh my freaking gosh she has only reminded him like a bajillion times that she needs new contacts because the one pair she has left totes hurts her eyes, most likely because she accidentally always falls asleep wearing them but whatever oh my GOSH.

TGIM: Okay, okay, I’ll order some online today and we’ll get them in a week or so.

MACK: OMG! A week?! (Chandler Bing style) Oh my gosh!

TGIM: Calm down! Ain’t no thang.

CAT: Ain’t no thang, ain’t no thang… Bing bong and chickadees! Hee. “New Girl” is fuuuunny, guys.

TGIM: Just wear your glasses until they get here.

CAT: “I’m the only one who hasn’t seen it!” Seriously. Schmidt is HI-larious!

MACK: Fine. But whenever I wear my glasses to school, all my friends congratulate me for getting my nerd on.

CAT: Pee-pee and bubbles!

MACK: MOM.

CAT: Glasses. Nerd. I’m listening.

HANNAH: They’re all like “Rocking the nerd look, huh, Hannah?!”

TGIM: Heh.

MACK: Yah. That’s on you.